Facere Iudicium
by chocolatecheesecakes
Summary: A decision. Two brothers, one alone, one with friends. The one alone will make a decision... But is it right? Written for Arithmancy in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.


**Hey everyone. This is written for Arithmancy in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. My challenge was to write about:**

**The Number 2: The Moon (Balance and Unbalance, Contrast and Opposite)**

**The qualities shown by a 2 in personality are imagination, creativity and Loyalty. The number 2 represents two faces, on the other side 2's are also moody, indecisiveness and withdrawn. When looking into the future the number 2 represents unbalance. We can predict events such as:**  
><strong>Conflict<strong>  
><strong>War<strong>  
><strong>Choice (Difficult choice that will have to be made)<strong>  
><strong>Divorce<strong>  
><strong>Write a story based on one of the events that can be foretold by the number Two.<strong>

**So, this is it. In case you're wondering, 'Facere Iudicium' means 'To do right' in Latin. Hooray for Google Translate! **

**Please review!**

Facere Iudicium

There were many adjectives I used to describe the scenes of what I was walking through, but none seemed to do justice. I shifted a little rubble away from my foot with my hand, trying not to look too closely at the pale leg I uncovered.

I was supposed to be with the Dark Lord, but some way, somehow… I was still here. It was like some unseen missing link asking me to keep pushing around, because then hopefully I'd see more clearly just what I'd done to the world. My world. Our world. Just because my parents were looking for a better son, and I filled that without hesitation.

The moon shone down on me, and I let my tears fall. Who knew who was under that rubble? I didn't, that was for sure. And in some way, I felt bad for not knowing – for having to pretend that I didn't care.

Because I _did_, if I was being true to myself. The pang that sounded in my chest beneath my Death Eater's robes rang true. And here I was, barely out of school, standing on a battlefield, knowing that my 'friends' and myself orchestrated this massacre.

I vomited on a clean, green patch of grass just some way away from the body of a woman I vaguely recognised. If any of the other Death Eaters were here, I would be scorned. Their youngest recruit, vomiting at the sight of a corpse… It didn't bare thinking about. As if someone might be watching, I straightened up, wiped my mouth on the back of my sleeve and swallowed down the rest of my bile.

Half-expecting one of my colleagues (I use that term in the loosest sense – I stopped admiring any of them such a long time ago) to jump out and stun me, or at the very least call the Dark Lord, I looked around, before closing the woman's unseeing blue eyes. That was the least I could do, as you can't say _sorry _for causing someone's death. I laughed at the thought, the wisecrack known only to myself, and wished privately that I could find a way to redeem myself.

And I _chose_.

* * *

><p><em>Dear Sirius,<em>

_ I know you won't want to hear from me in the slightest, and that you still think me a merciless Death Eater that held and stuck to all the ideals mother and father threw at us daily in our childhood. _

_ But the fact remains that I realise just what I have done to you, and the rest of the Wizarding and Muggle worlds. You were always the strong one of the two of us Sirius, and I was always the one to be taken in by our parent's beliefs. _

_ I had to make a choice, Sirius. A choice that would either kill me, or save you and your side. And one of the reasons that I have not written until now is because I have only just made my decision. Don't come looking for me Sirius, because the treachery I am about to commit will end in my death, one way or another._

_ Kreacher is to help me and guide me through this, so that mother and father do not have to know what I am about to do. I know you thought mother never had a heart Sirius, but she does, deep down, and I know that you broke it. And I am about to break it again._

_ I do not know how much longer she will last without either of us Sirius._

_ So, I guess, what I am asking you is this: consider yourself, in the grand scheme of things. What can you do to help others, and what decision do you have to make? What implications will your decision have?_

_ My choice is to help your side in any way that I can Sirius. Please understand why I couldn't do this sooner, but it took a walk through a battlefield and looking down at a dead woman's face for me to make a choice for definite._

_ Yes, I will die, but to many, death is but the next big adventure. And I hope and wish that I would one day meet you again big brother, whether that is to be in death or in life. But if it is in death, than I hope it will not be for a long, long time, and that you will forgive me for all the sin and wrong that I have done in my short life._

_ Your brother,_

_ Regulus Arcturus Black_

_ R.A.B._

_ 22__nd__ March, 1979_


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